How to Cook Steaks or Chops

Difficulty: Medium but takes some practice to get the doneness right

Prep time: depends how much trimming the steak needs

Cooking time: 10 minutes per inch of steak

Cost per serving: $1.00 and up depending on the quality and cut of meat

Useful leftovers: Holy Escoffier yes!

Is there anything more satisfying than a good steak!

There are a couple of tricks to making a really great steak and here they are. These apply to beef steaks, pork chops, lamb, whatever but for clarity's sake I am going to use beef in all the examples.

Pork tenderloin with red eye (coffee!) gravy

First you have to start with a good piece of meat. Since steak is a simple dish the ingredients truly matter.

Knowing which cut to use makes a huge difference.  Muscles that get used a lot like the leg and shoulder do not make tender steaks. They have to braised or ground to get them to be tender enough to eat.


The most tender part of a mammal is the tenderloin, a long thin muscle that lays against the spine. On an animal where the spine is horizontal, like cattle, the tenderloin does practically nothing. It has very little fat or connective tissue. It's the most tender cut but also the least flavorful. It's the most expensive part of the animal because it is so tender, but that hardly makes it the best steak.

One of my favorites - lamb flank steaks!

Next on the list are cuts that come from the rib section, such as the rib-eye and the New York strip. These are the perfect combination of tenderness and flavor.  Marbling, or the fat in between the muscle fibers, will determine the quality and price of the steak. At the top is Wagyu, or Kobe style beef. It is very rich with obvious marbling all through the meat. I'll never forget the first time I tried it at Grace in Los Angeles. It's expensive but really a great experience to eat.

Sirloin chops come from an area that gets a little more exercise so they are not quite as tender but still can be good eating.  Steaks from the round and flank are less tender yet but still can be made into good steaks. There are other small steaks that are interesting but come from less tender areas of the animal. I like flat iron steaks that come from the shoulder. There are only two small steaks per animal but they have an interesting texture and a lot of flavor. They also cook very quickly.

Steaks cut from the shoulder and leg can be rather chewy.

Pork sirloin steak with chipotle and powdered garlic

So now to the technique.

1) Take the steaks out of the fridge and let them come to room temperature before you cook them. Rub them with oil to help brown them.

2) Salt but don't pepper them right before cooking. You'll add more salt later so don't over do it.

3) If you are cooking indoors use a heavy bottomed pan. The heavy bottom will spread the heat evenly and will not cool off when you put the meat in it.

If you are cooking outdoors get your grill hot.

Rolled lamb leg steak with Super Sauce

 4) Use the guideline of ten minutes per inch to cook the meat. If it is less than an inch thick you can cook it right on top of the stove but if it is thicker you'll want to brown it on top of the stove, baste it then finish it in a hot oven. This improves the texture and keeps the outside from overcooking while the meat cooks through.

To test for doneness the best way is to press the steak with your finger. If it is soft it is rare. If it is firm but still a little soft in the middle it is medium rare (this is where I take it off the heat). If it is firm it is well done. If you are not sure you can take a small knife and peek inside.

Let the steak rest for a couple of minutes before serving it. If you cut into it right away the moisture will run right out and the meat will get gray, toughen up and be dry.

Dry Fried Asparagus

Difficulty: Very Easy

Prep time: 5 minutes

Cooking time: 4 minutes

Cost per serving: $0.25 to $0.40

Useful leftovers: Yes

Dry frying is my technique of cooking vegetables in a dry hot pan until done then dressed lightly with oil or butter and seasonings.

It is really easy and fast and the veggies taste fantastic.

You need a heavy bottomed pan. You can't make this in a thin bottomed pan. Maybe you can, but I can't.

This recipe works really well with asparagus, green beans, squash, carrots, onions, celery, etc.

Asparagus, washed carefully and dried, tough stalks removed and cut into 1/2" pieces
A tiny bit of butter
Salt and pepper

Heat a cast iron pan until it is fairly hot. You don't want it extremely hot but if you drop a drop of water on it it should sizzle and the water should evaporate quickly.

Put the chopped veggies in one layer in the pan. It's ok if they don't all quite fit but if you have two complete layers the veggies will get soggy.

Shake the pan every couple of minutes while they cook. Let the veggies cook until they are slightly brown and just barely done. Toss in the bit of butter and swirl the pan just until the butter is melted and pour out into a serving dish. Season with salt and pepper and stir gently.

Brown Rice Risotto

Difficulty: Easy

Prep time: 5 minutes

Cooking time: 1 hour but most of it is just watching and stirring

Cost per serving: $0.50 to $2.00 or more if you use fancy ingredients like expensive mushrooms

Useful leftovers: Very useful! Great reheated or used to thicken soup

This is a great recipe. It takes a long time but there is little work to do. Despite what TV cooks will tell you you don't need arborio or carnaroli rice. The texture of this risotto is surprisingly like the classic risotto but with a nuttier flavor and of course it's a lot better for you. Not only is it a whole grain dish I don't dump a half pound of cheese on it - but you could. My version is vegan but you could use chicken or beef stock instead of the mushroom stock, and you can add bits of cooked meat as a garnish.

This recipe takes over an hour to cook but after the first ten minutes you just have to stir and add liquid when needed, which is every few minutes.

The best rice for this is brown basmati rice. I love the nutty taste which really comes out in this dish. It's really versatile too; you can eat it as is, add nuts, cheese, bits of leftover meat, you can throw it in a soup or you can put it on a tray and refrigerate it, cut it into shapes and deep fry it.

1 onion, minced
1 tablespoon of olive oil
1 ounce dried mushrooms
2 cups of brown rice
1 clove of garlic, minced
Fresh or dried thyme
4 cups of hot water

Put the wild mushrooms in the hot water. Stir them up and push them down so they are all wet. Keep this stock on a low heat or keep it covered while you make the risotto. If it cools down heat it up again. You want the stock to be just below the boiling point while you add it to the rice over the course of an hour.

Saute the onions in the olive oil with the thyme until the onions are cooked but not browned. Add the rice and stir to coat the rice and cook for a couple of minutes. It should smell quite nutty.

Add enough mushroom stock to barely cover the rice and stir like mad. Leave the rice over really low heat and every few minutes stir it like mad. You don't want to be gentle, you want to put little holes in the rice.

When there is just a little liquid left in the rice add more to cover and stir like mad again.

If you start to run out of stock and the rice isn't cooked just add some more hot water to the mushrooms.

After 45 minutes or so you'll start to see a nice creamy quality to the liquid in the rice. When you see that and the rice is no longer hard the risotto is done.

Add salt and pepper (be generous as the rice is bland) and if they are tender add the mushrooms from the soaking liquid.

You can garnish the risotto with fresh herbs, cheese, bits of meat, water chestnuts, etc.

Sauteed Celery

Difficulty: Easy

Prep time: 2 minutes

Cooking time: 5 minutes

Cost per serving: $0.25 to $0.50

Useful leftovers: Good reheated and good to throw in soup or use other ways

This is a simple dish but it's unusual and has a lot of flavor and texture.

Celery
Olive Oil
Salt, pepper and a pinch of celery seeds.

Wash and slice a few ribs of celery about 1/4 inch thick. Heat a dry, heavy bottomed pan and add the celery and let it sit for a minute or two until it starts to turn brown. Add a bit of olive oil (just for flavor really) and grind a pinch of celery seeds with your fingers over it, sprinkle with salt and serve.

Takes a couple of minutes, is low in calories and tastes great. Simple and delicious and unusual enough to serve at the fanciest tables.

You can vary the recipe by adding onions, corn, parsnips, parsley, etc. It's great for a bed for entrees.

How to cook Green Beans

Quick, easy and so tasty as a side dish.

Difficulty: Easy

Prep time: up to ten minutes

Cooking time: 1 to 5 minutes

Cost per serving: $0.50 to $1.00

Useful leftovers: Yes

I love this method of cooking vegetables. They steam in their own juices and get a little browning action.

Clean, dry and trim some green beans. Cut them into one inch lengths.



Get a heavy bottomed pan hot and add the beans. Do not put oil or butter in the pan first. Don't stir them, let them brown.

When you can see they are about a third of the way done shake the pan and turn them all over to cook the other side.

When they are about a third of the way done on the second side add a pat or two of butter and swirl the pan. Sprinkle with salt and pepper and remove from the pan immediately.

The beans will be crunchy and have a great deep flavor.

This recipe also works with zucchini, celery, parsnips, etc.

Easy, Fast, Tasty, Pea soup

Just one word - YUM!

Difficulty: Easy

Prep time: up to ten minutes

Cooking time: 5 minutes

Cost per serving: $0.50 and up depending on garnishes

Useful leftovers: Yes


Just like the title says this is easy, fast and very tasty. 

1 small onion or half a big one
1 small carrot of half a big one
1 pound bag of frozen peas, rinsed with hot water
Pinch of thyme, fresh or dried
1 tablespoon of olive oil

Cut the carrot and onion into small dice. Saute gently in the olive oil until they are cooked but not browned. This is called sweating.

Add the peas and enough water just to cover them. Bring to a boil and blend, either with a stick or regular blender or in a food processor. Salt and pepper to taste.

To make it fancy blend it really well then force it through a sieve. This will get rid of any bits of veggies that didn't puree completely and give you a smoother texture.

You can add a touch of cream and a dot of butter if you want a more classic French style soup.

You can garnish this soup many ways. I like crunchy or salty things as they contrast with the mild soup. Croutons, nuts, bits of ham, small chunks of lemon and bits of black olive are all great with this soup. You could put a dollop of yogurt or sour cream in the middle for a nice garnish.

Hartman House Dressing/Marinade/Cheap Drunk

NOTE: For reasons of historical accuracy and general laziness I have not edited this recipe, hence the layout problems and such. Sorry.  It's another thing we created to get plant matter into our kids stomachs. Enjoy!


1 liter     Kalamata Olive oil (1)
1 cup or so cheap balsamic vinegar
1 large wine glass     Latour '63
4 or 5  anchovy fillets, or smoked herring (see NOTE)
1/2   Lemon
1 big blopping tablespoon     Dijon mustard
1 Boatload     garlic, peeled,  little brown umbilicals and any brown spots cut off (2)
1 Boatload     fresh herbs (3)
Wooooseeestershire sauce to taste, probably a teaspoon or so
Freshly cracked black pepper to taste
One nasty little pinch of sugar
Salt to taste

1) Juice the lemon and if you want, chop up a teaspoon or so of the zest. Rinse the herbs and dry them on a paper towel. (4)

2) Put the garlic, mustard, anchovies, herbs, lemon juice and zest into a food processor. Add enough balsamic vinegar just to cover it and chop the bejeezes out of it. It doesn't need to be pureed,  it should have lots of little pieces in it.

3) With the motor running if possible, add a few drops of olive oil. Let it process for a few seconds to start the emulsion. Slowly add more oil, waiting for it to process every few seconds.

I don't have a big food processor, so at this point I put it into a large bowl and use a wire whisk to beat it like DELETED as I slowly add the oil. You'll want to add more vinegar.

4) Call me first, then rush like hell over to my house so I can have the Latour. Hmm, maybe I'll make myself a steak to go with it. Thanks!

5) Add the Woosterstuff sauce, pepper and sugar. Mix it up and taste it (I like to use a cucumber stick or jicama, but a clean finger works well) before you add any salt, or more pepper or other stuff.

(1) OK, so you'll need a little less than that.
(2) 1 boatload equals a dozen big cloves or so. At least.
(3) A bunch of basil and half a bunch of parsley does well. I use about two cups of herbs.
(4) You don't have to go crazy drying the herbs, they're full of water anyway.

 NOTE: If you are using canned anchovies or anchovy paste you don't have to rinse them. If you are using the fancy salted anchovies then soak them for five minutes in water, then pull their little spines out, pinch off any bones or guts that are left on them (this is why anchovies don't like humans) and rinse them well. You can also use smoked herring, which is really cheap and you can get it in any market. A can costs about a buck. Sometimes they are called kippers or kippered herring. Use the ones in oil, not sauce.

NEXT NOTE: It hardly ever stays emulsified so don't worry about it.

EVEN MORE OF THESE DAMN NOTES:  You might notice that I have these NB type notes and the numbered notes above. I noticed that too. Too much Fledermaus will do that to ya.

SIGH - MORE NOTES:  If you are going to use a different oil, I would recommend cheaper rather than more expensive. You are going to process it with a boatload of garlic and anchovies. Any subtle flavor derived from the precious volcanic soils of Vesuvius are going to be smothered by the fragrant tang of the fruit of Gilroy.